Story Time!

"Mom, I haf to tell you somefing."

Okay, go.

"Once upon a time, dere was a white truck. It had a shining wight an it was ready to go back to da city. I was runnin down da street not holwding hands and de truck made me fwat as a pancake. Amen."

(Perhaps I go a little overboard with my warnings?)

"I hab another one."

Okay, go.

"Once upon a time, dere was a bwack truck and it wasn't ready to go. Dis time, mommy and daddy were holwding my hands in da parking wot an I was safe. Amen."

(Maybe not?)

Nothing To It

I've debated posting this for a few days now, just because it's one of those things that may only be funny to me.

But I've recently acquired some additional information that made me decide to take the leap- so just bear with me. This could get mundane. For anyone who is not a parent of BigM, anyway. Feel free to vote in a comment if you like this story or not. It won't hurt my feelings if you don't and then I'll just delete your comment. Just kidding. (Maybe.)

I also need to quickly note that my parents just got the internet hooked up at their house. So I have to stop posting such awful, bad, terrible things about them on here. (Mom, Dad- don't go back reading. Just start here and move forward with me.)

Okay. Back to the story at hand. I consider myself so lucky that my kids are great eaters. I don't know how I managed that, but somehow, both of them will eat just about anything. Recently, however, BigM has become a little more picky and that is making mealtimes a little more challenging.

DM didn't have a lot of variation in his meals growing up and he says that when he complained, his dad would say, "There is not a menu, this is not a restuarant." I used to tell BigM that when she was not eating her pureed peas, but it didn't do either of us much good. Our dinner time rule is if she doesn't eat what's put in front of her, she can have a plain piece of whole wheat bread. No butter, no jelly, not toasted- just plain bread. If you ask me, that's gross, but then again, I don't cook stuff I don't like to eat.

A couple of nights ago, someone graciously (or maybe maliciously, I can't decide) sent DM home with nine chocolate frosted cupcakes with sprinkles. And it's hard to hide a clear plastic box that big. So of course they were sitting out on the counter when BigM came to the table for dinner. I don't have to tell you where this is going, do I?

We made a deal with her- if she ate everything- every. single. bite. on her plate, she could have a cupcake. Knowing she doesn't really eat pork, doesn't really like cooked apples and won't touch fried green tomatoes with a 10 foot pole, I figured I was out of the woods on having to give her a cupcake. Those things are the devil. All those trans-fats and sugar... mmmmm!

That's right, halfway through the meal, we break out the plain bread. After everyone else is finished with the meal, DM takes LM upstairs for her bath. Apparently, explaining to BigM that she had to clean her plate 2.3 million times wasn't clear enough, so she burst into tears when I told her she couldn't have a cupcake because 99% of her meal was still on her plate. With determination in her eyes, and bread in her tummy, she decided to brave the plate. (They were some awesome looking cupcakes, my friends.)

Slowly, slowly she puts a few bites of pork in her mouth. She then starts singing a song, "There's a party in my tummy, yummy yummy yummy {repeat}" I have this vauge memory from long ago one time at my parent's house watching YoGabbaGabba- and right before I poked my eyeballs out with a dull pencil, I recall them singing something like that.

I asked her, because she watches YGG at Lolli's house, but she informed me that her BFF at preschool (AK) sings that song during snacktime, not the weird guy wearing an orange leisure suit. Sure thing, BigM. She then preceeds to tell me, "It's pork's birthday. He can't wait to get to the party in my tummy. Carrot is already at the party and pork is so excited."

Okay, my kid is kind of weird. But it was really funny.

So this afternoon, she told me she really wanted spaghetti for lunch, which is one of DM's least favorite meals. He came in from running errands and I told him what was on the menu and he wrinkled his nose and said, "Maybe I'll have something else."

BigM struck a pose, with one hand on her hip and the pasta box in the other, looked him straight in the eye and said sternly, "You can hab dis... or nothing. Das your choices."

We both burst out laughing. (And yes, he did eat the spaghetti. And BigM finally got her cupcake, because she cleaned her plate at lunch.)

Peas in a Pod

It's official, as of two days ago, I am the mother of two walking children.

Now if they were both potty trained, I'd be set. (Or it would be time for another one, no?)

Luck of the Draw

I'm going to file this under "My kid is the most awesome kid on earth, and she's cuter and brighter and smarter than any other kid I know." I like to think that's true, anyway. As far as I can tell, most Moms think that about their children. But mine really is. (Okay, they both are, but today's story is about BigM.)

Today BigM was coloring and she brought her paper to show me and said, "Wook, Mama, I drawed my name." Sure you did, honey.

Wait- BIGM, DID WRITE HER NAME! Really, truly, my just-turned-three-year-old absolutely 100% wrote her name, clear as day, with a marker on a piece of paper. She's just lucky her name contains all straight lines, right?

I'm saving it forever. She already told me she thinks that's weird, but I'm doing it anyway.

BigM needs a little blog attention, and I've noticed she needs a little real life attention as well.

She starts Preschool tomorrow. Sniff (I guess.) Honestly, I'm really looking forward to having some time with LM or even for myself now. We did the whole "First Day of School" thing last year so I think I'm over it. Until she starts "real" school anyway. I will post a picture of her first day soon. (I actually think you all think I'm crying wolf about these pictures. One day you will visit the blog and there will be pics on every post. I just don't think that day will be tomorrow. Or the next day, but do stay tuned.) I do think I'm going to take a picture of each of my kids on the first day of school until they leave for college or refuse to have their pictures taken.

Anyway, my favorite recent BigM story involves one of my favorite things, food. We were eating peanut butter crackers and she prefers to take them apart and lick out the peanut butter.

Then she hands me the two crackers and says, "Here Mom, you can eat my crust."

Texas Ranger!

She did it, she walked two steps on her own yesterday. Lucky for me, that's all she did and she has not repeated her new trick. My days are numbered, though.

I am constantly reminding my family not to encourage the walking, as it will make my life even more interesting than it already is.